Well before I continue to write this letter, I must say I didn't feel like writing, my heart was lost and I didn't think I could fix it. Within this past week I've figure somethings out especially my love life. So here it is..................
The past months have been the most difficult since my divorce, I thought I could forget you and move on with others but yet you stayed on my mind. I tried to erase everything we had and been through. In the mist of it all, I'm still in love with you, I also hurt someone and for that I'm sorry! But I can't keep putting my feelings to the side and stop lying to myself. We have been through so much together and to let it all go is crazy. You let me do me (right and wrong) an yet you still t Love me. I'm sorry for ever letting you go and I know there are good and bad roads ahead but know I'm here for the count. So your stuck with me!
When we 1st met I never thought we would ever be an yet you were there through my darkest days. You have seen me happy and sad, depressed, crazy, and over joyed. My heart can't take not being with you. When your going through your darkest days, for me not being there breaks my heart, so I'm here now an I'M not going anywhere, unless My LORD AND SAVIOR said, different!
Love Always,
Cheryl
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Sunday, June 6, 2010
FRIENDS?
Lately I've been questioning the friends I have. When I think of friends I think of people you can call on through the good and the bad. I call friends, texts friends just to check on them but no one seem to do that for me. Now don't get me wrong there is a couple of people that will call and say Hey girl what's up,but lately no. I've tried to be strong and hold on but it hurt. Yes I call on the Lord and Savior but I need a human conversation. I've been through so much especially when it come to friends, I've had some come and go, some stayed and some I told to go. I guess that why I value my friendships. Now I had to learn along the way on not to share information with one friend because they would talk among each other and find out what was said. My crew was like girlfriends (television show). But we grew apart, one friend is mad at the other friend. Just like Joan and Toni, I have two friend that are not talking to each other for very different reason that I don't have a clue but don't like each other no more. We are getting older an I would hope wiser and yes we are going to do things our friends might not like or agree but lets move on. Life is too short, I Love all the people I called my friends, I AM Trust Worthy Person and I don't like being Lied on. As of today, I'm removing some people from my list of friends. I have Prayed on this and this is the decision, YOU have no clue what a true friend is,I wish you all the luck in the whole world but I will be not be included!
Sunday, May 30, 2010
Depression use to be my friend
As I sit back and think on how far I've come and still have a lot to go but when I think about how God has bought me through, all I can say is thank you! Now don't get me wrong I still have moment when I feel like the world is against me but I don't turn to food anymore ( Ben & Jerry) I could have sworn I was in a relationship with the both of them ( LOL). But now I turn to prayer!
Going through the divorce was the easy part, it was the marriage that was the depressing part. The first 6 months was great,then after it went to hell! But going through it all I'm a better person. Now I could give you all the details on my personal heart ache but I'm not! But realize I've been through it all, so use your imagination.
I realize you must have a test to have a testimony; Yes we all have depressing story, some worst than others but you must grow and move on, cause while your walking around sad and lonely they are doing the opposite! It took me a long time to understand that, but prayer is the answer to all the situations you going through. Now reading an understanding the word ( Bible) is awesome, I can only tell you the great things God is doing in my life, you must try Him for yourself and your depression will leave! Now bad and sad time will happen but handling the problem will be different once you understand there is a reason to the madness! ( test to have a testimony)
Depression is No Longer my Friend!
Going through the divorce was the easy part, it was the marriage that was the depressing part. The first 6 months was great,then after it went to hell! But going through it all I'm a better person. Now I could give you all the details on my personal heart ache but I'm not! But realize I've been through it all, so use your imagination.
I realize you must have a test to have a testimony; Yes we all have depressing story, some worst than others but you must grow and move on, cause while your walking around sad and lonely they are doing the opposite! It took me a long time to understand that, but prayer is the answer to all the situations you going through. Now reading an understanding the word ( Bible) is awesome, I can only tell you the great things God is doing in my life, you must try Him for yourself and your depression will leave! Now bad and sad time will happen but handling the problem will be different once you understand there is a reason to the madness! ( test to have a testimony)
Depression is No Longer my Friend!
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
A New Beginning!
Hello, I'm so excited to have my own blog, which isn't that hard to do but didn't have the mind set to do it until now! This blog is to really help me and maybe help someone else. These are just my thoughts and you don't have to agree with it but have a open mind on anything I talk about. Yes sometimes I will wig out on someone or something but I can only be me. So I hope you enjoy the ride to UPGRADE your thoughts!
This year I turn 40! Yes the Big 40, I don't feel different but I have a lot of confident which I didn't have before. I say what on my mind and that might not be a good thing (laughing) but I do. If I see a guy I like, I let HIM know. Now don't get me wrong I'm very old fashion an I like a guy to approach me but it doesn't always happen that way. I've been single for awhile, I was in a relationship for a long time an it ended, for reason I sometime don't understand but it is what it is! I thought a man wanted a go getter? Make the money an also take care of home? That's a whole other subject we will touch on later. But I know God will answer my Prayers, to find that one true Love that Love me for all the craziness I Am! So to all my independent women that is Looking for True Love, LET THE HUNT BEGAN!
This year I turn 40! Yes the Big 40, I don't feel different but I have a lot of confident which I didn't have before. I say what on my mind and that might not be a good thing (laughing) but I do. If I see a guy I like, I let HIM know. Now don't get me wrong I'm very old fashion an I like a guy to approach me but it doesn't always happen that way. I've been single for awhile, I was in a relationship for a long time an it ended, for reason I sometime don't understand but it is what it is! I thought a man wanted a go getter? Make the money an also take care of home? That's a whole other subject we will touch on later. But I know God will answer my Prayers, to find that one true Love that Love me for all the craziness I Am! So to all my independent women that is Looking for True Love, LET THE HUNT BEGAN!
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